today

this morning i saw is TAI! FUCK FOREVER!!

sleepless night

heyya, so long i'm not writing in this blog. because i'm so lazyyyy hehe. yea this is just my words in my feeling. but sorry i'm just copas hehe, check this...

I Cry Tonight

You'd say baby I love you
I'd say I love you too...
I liked it when you called me baby
but now I need someone to save me
from the misery
the sleepless nights
the pain
of a broken heart
of a lost soul
I don;t know what to do anymore
I am so lost without you
My love was real
I'm thinking yours was fake
I would never have hurt you
the way you hurt me
I would never have made you cry
the way you made me cry
I would never have made you cry
as many times you made me
I cry almost every night now
I wish I had saved all those tears
that you made me cry
so I can drown you in them
I wish I had you
I wish I had someone to hold me
the way you held me
I wish I had someone to kiss me
the way you kissed me
I wish I had someone to make me feel special
the way you made me feel special
I wish I had someone to make me feel beautiful
the way you made me feel beautiful
the way you told me I was beautiful
am I not beautiful now?
am I not special now?
am I not kissable now?
am I not holdable now?
I wish so many things
My biggest wish is you
I wish all these things
The only wish I want to come true is you
It's dissapointing
I know I can't have you
But I wish I had you
I have had you in the past
but i screwed up
I made no effort
I love you so much
All I need is your touch
I can't get your touch
and can't have you
The last time you touched me
You hit me
whether you were playing or not
your last touch was when you hit me
the love
the pain
they say dont cry because its over
smile because it happened
but I'm not smiling
I'm crying
I cry tonight

when did all go wrong

i don't know what must i do when this feel is came. i just want to alone, alone everyday. and i want nobody don't know where i am. and i want get away from my home. and i just need alone, really2 alone in this fuckin world. and i hope with this struggle i can survive anymore and fix anything to make a new life, new wold, new soul (sorry we are no longer)

haha, fuckya!

OOOH!!! why do i give valueable time to people who don't care if i live or die? and i don't make sense anymore. maybe i'm just disappointed and paranoia. and of course... heaven knows i'm miserable now -_-"

nothing to fear... (forever)

yeah yeah yeah... this is my prahara cinta season (blah blah)
hmm start as well as i read this poets(maybe).. and i had a bad memories with my lighter and actually i don't want to remember her again. but overmyhead i cannot forget her, and i don't know why...

check this out the poets, hihi

I see you staring at me,
but you never truly see,

why I love you, oh, so much,
when you're so out of touch.

feelings that we could have shared,
you flung behind without a care.

it seems so hard to let you go,
and the process is so slow.

i don't know whether I should stay,
and waste another day away.

i do know, though, that all this pain,
will soon drive me insane.

you don't feel me loving you,
and you just can't seem to get a clue.

you don't see me cry inside,
and in you I know I can't confide.

yet still I find that you are blind,
to things meant to be kind.

you know nothing of my fears,
and are unaware of all my tears.

i know I really can't deny,
things I feel as I look you in the eye.

so who will help me make it though?
Who will tell me what to do?

how come every time I see your face,
for me there's never any space?

maybe someday you'll see me differently,
so until then, I'll be waiting silently.